The File-13 Lady

This is a short sketch I did a while ago. I really did meet such a person. Believe it or not...

I met a woman today. She towered over me (I am tall). She was even taller, very angular, wearing lots of jewellery and very small bright red leather shoes. After a while she poured us some wine and said that we should clink glasses. She said we should look each other in the eye when we clinked or else it would mean seven years of 'bad sex'. She said that we should say 'moerse' every time we clinked glasses. I looked her in the eye, we clunk glasses, I remembered just in time to say 'moerse' and I and thanked my stars we were not on a ship.

She looked at my feet over the rim of her glasses over the rim of her wine glass. I was barefoot and she said that it is right that I am not wearing shoes and that if one is not going to be wearing red leather veldskoens one ought not to be wearing shoes at all.

She told me that she filed people. I think she meant that she does filing for people, but I'm not sure. She said that she called her customers 'filings'. Then she gave me her bussiness card. I don't know what to do with it. File it or something I suppose. But I am not good at that sort of thing and I dont know what to file her under. People do that to one sometimes. The harder you try to forget them the more you remember them because there they are - occupying space in your wallet, together with the photograph of your husband and kids - just because you don't know what else to do with them.